
How I Went From Couch Potato to Running a Half Marathon in 6 Months
Let me set the scene for you. It's a Tuesday night in August, and I'm sitting on my couch in basketball shorts that haven't seen a basketball court since the Obama administration. There's a half-eaten sleeve of Oreos on the coffee table, I'm three episodes deep into a show I don't even like, and my phone's screen time report just told me I averaged six hours and forty-two minutes of daily usage last week. Cool. Great. Living the dream.
Then my buddy Dave texts me a photo from a barbecue we went to over the weekend. I open it, and there I am — standing next to the grill holding a paper plate loaded with potato salad, wearing a t-shirt that's doing absolutely heroic work trying to contain whatever was happening around my midsection. I looked like a guy whose main hobby was gravity. My chin had a chin. I stared at that photo for a solid two minutes.
That wasn't even the wake-up call. The wake-up call came three days later when I walked up two flights of stairs at work because the elevator was out, and I arrived at my desk genuinely winded. Like, hand-on-the-desk, catching-my-breath, coworker-asking-if-I-was-okay winded. From stairs. Twenty-six steps. I counted them later because I needed to quantify exactly how pathetic that was.
I was thirty-one years old and stairs were beating me. Something had to change.
The Dumbest Decision I Ever Made (That Turned Out Great)
I don't know why I picked running. I hated running. In high school gym class, the mile run was my annual public humiliation. I once told a PE teacher I had asthma to get out of it. I did not have asthma. But sitting there that Friday night, having just declined an invite to go out because my "good" jeans didn't fit anymore, I downloaded the Nike Run Club app and told myself I'd go for a run in the morning.
Saturday morning came. I put on the only athletic shoes I owned — some ancient New Balance dad shoes I'd bought at a Costco three years prior — and walked outside. It was 7 AM. The air was warm. Two joggers passed my building and made it look effortless. I could do this.
I could not do this.
I made it approximately four minutes before my lungs staged a full revolt. Four minutes. I was gasping like a fish on a dock. My shins felt like someone was driving nails into them. A woman walking her golden retriever passed me, and the dog looked at me with what I can only describe as pity. I walked home, sat on my front steps, and seriously considered that maybe I was just a guy who sits on couches and that was fine and I should accept it.
But that photo. Those stairs. That look the golden retriever gave me.
I went back out the next morning.
Weeks 1-2: The Humbling
Here's what nobody tells you about starting to run when you're out of shape: everything hurts, and not in the cool way. Not in the "feeling the burn" way that fitness influencers talk about. In the "is this what dying feels like" way. My knees ached. My ankles were angry. I had shin splints before I even knew what shin splints were. Muscles I didn't know existed were filing formal complaints.
I found a Couch to 5K program — the classic C25K — and it was exactly what I needed because it starts embarrassingly easy. The first week is literally "jog for 60 seconds, walk for 90 seconds, repeat." And even that kicked my ass. I'd be huffing through those 60-second jog intervals thinking, "This program was designed for beginners and I'm struggling with it. I am a beginner's beginner. I am the person the program was worried about."
My pace those first two weeks was something like a 14-minute mile. For context, the average walking speed is about a 15-minute mile. I was barely outpacing pedestrians. A guy in jeans and flip-flops almost kept up with me once. I'm pretty sure he wasn't trying to.
But here's the thing — I kept going out. Not because I was motivated. Motivation is a lie. I kept going out because I was angry. Angry at the stairs, angry at the photo, angry at myself for letting it get this far. Anger is an underrated fuel source. Way more reliable than motivation, which shows up like an unreliable friend who's always "five minutes away."
Month 1: Getting Slightly Less Terrible
Two things happened in the first month that made a real difference. First, I went to an actual running store — not a Dick's Sporting Goods, not a Foot Locker, an actual running store where a twenty-something dude who looked like a greyhound in human form analyzed my gait and told me I overpronate. I didn't know what that meant, but I nodded like I did. He put me in a pair of Brooks Ghost 16s, and I'm not exaggerating when I say it was a revelation. Running in actual running shoes versus whatever those Costco nightmares were is like the difference between sleeping on a mattress and sleeping on a pile of phone books. Everything felt better immediately.
Those shoes cost me $140, and they were worth every penny. If you take one thing from this entire story, let it be this: do not cheap out on running shoes. Your knees will thank you. Your shins will thank you. Your will to continue living will thank you.
The second thing that happened was I discovered Strava. For the uninitiated, Strava is basically social media for runners and cyclists, and it does this beautiful, evil thing where it tracks all your runs and shows you your progress over time. Seeing those numbers improve — even slightly — was addictive. My first logged run was 1.2 miles at a 13:45 pace. By the end of the month, I was doing 2.5 miles at an 11:30 pace. Still slow. Still not impressive by any real runner's standards. But the trajectory was everything.
I also learned a critical lesson during Month 1 that I will now share with you in the hope that you never have to learn it the way I did: do not eat a burrito before a run. I don't care if it was four hours ago. I don't care if it was a small burrito. I don't care if you think you have an iron stomach. Beans and cheese and running are a combination that will humble you in ways you didn't think were possible. I'll spare you the details, but I will say that I now know exactly where every public restroom is within a three-mile radius of my apartment. That's not knowledge I wanted. It's knowledge the burrito gave me.
Month 2: The 5K and the High
Five weeks in, I signed up for a local 5K. Not a big fancy race — one of those small Saturday morning charity things where half the participants are walking and the other half are serious runners who finish before you've hit the halfway mark. I told myself I just had to finish. No time goal. Just finish.
I finished in 34 minutes and 12 seconds. That's an 11:02 pace. I was drenched in sweat, my face was the color of a fire truck, and I'm fairly certain I looked like I was one mile away from needing an ambulance. But I crossed that finish line and felt something I genuinely did not expect: a rush. An actual, honest-to-God runner's high. I'd always thought that was something runners made up to justify their suffering, like Stockholm syndrome with sneakers. But it's real. It's this wave of endorphins that hits you after sustained effort, and it feels like someone injected warm optimism directly into your bloodstream.
I stood there in the finisher's area, hands on my knees, breathing like a broken vacuum cleaner, and I felt incredible. I also immediately signed up for another 5K the following month because apparently one hit of runner's high turns you into an addict.
Month 2 was also when the shin splints got serious. If you don't know what shin splints feel like, imagine someone tapping the front of your lower legs with a small hammer — constantly. I tried to run through them because I'd read some macho nonsense online about pushing through pain. Do not do this. I repeat: do not run through shin splints. I ended up having to take five days off, during which I iced my shins, rolled them with a foam roller (which hurts in a way that makes you question your life choices), and did calf stretches. When I came back, I started running on softer surfaces — trails instead of concrete — and the shin splints gradually backed off.
This is also when I switched from the Nike Run Club app to a structured training plan for a 10K. Nike Run Club is great for getting started, and the guided runs are genuinely helpful (Coach Bennett's voice has talked me through more pain than any actual person in my life). But I wanted more structure, so I downloaded a Hal Higdon 10K plan and started following it religiously.
Month 3: The Mental Game
Here's what surprised me the most about running: the physical part is maybe 40% of it. The other 60% is entirely mental. By Month 3, my body could handle the miles. My legs were stronger, my lungs had adapted, my resting heart rate had dropped from 78 to 65 (I bought a cheap Garmin watch and became obsessed with my metrics like the nerd I apparently am). Physically, I was capable.
But my brain was a different story. My brain was constantly trying to get me to stop. Every run, around mile 2 or 3, my brain would start its campaign: "This is hard. You could stop. Nobody would know. Your couch is right there. You have ice cream in the freezer. Isn't this enough? Haven't you proven your point?"
Learning to tell that voice to shut up was the single most valuable skill I developed — not just for running, but for everything. Because that voice shows up everywhere. At work when a project gets hard. In relationships when a conversation gets uncomfortable. At the gym, in the kitchen, in every area of your life where doing the hard thing and doing the easy thing are both options. Running taught me to hear that voice, acknowledge it, and keep moving anyway.
I also started paying attention to nutrition around this time. Not in a crazy diet way — I've tried diets and they make me miserable and I abandon them within two weeks. But I started eating more protein, actually consuming vegetables like some kind of functioning adult, and timing my meals so I wasn't running on a full stomach (see: burrito incident). I cut back on alcohol from maybe 8-10 drinks a week to 2-3, mostly because I discovered that running with a hangover is one of the worst experiences available to a human being. Worse than the burrito. I didn't think that was possible.
I ran my first 10K at the end of Month 3. Finished in 58 minutes. Under an hour. When I told my buddy Dave — the one who'd taken the barbecue photo — he said, "Dude, what happened to you?" Like I'd joined a cult. I guess in a way I had. The cult of people who voluntarily wake up early to suffer in running shoes. We're a strange group, but we have good calves.
Month 4: When Running Gets Real
Month 4 was when I started training specifically for the half marathon, and this is where things stopped being cute. A 5K is 3.1 miles — you can gut through that on stubbornness alone. A 10K is 6.2 — challenging but manageable. A half marathon is 13.1 miles, and training for it requires long runs that take over an hour. Sometimes close to two hours.
Let me tell you about long runs. Long runs are a special kind of misery. You wake up on a Saturday morning, eat a banana and some peanut butter toast, lace up your shoes, and go run for 90 minutes. Not jog. Not walk-jog. Run. For an hour and a half. Through neighborhoods you've never been to. Past people having nice relaxed mornings on their porches while you're out there looking like a man who's being chased by something invisible.
I did my first 8-miler on a morning when it was 45 degrees and raining. I considered skipping it. Almost did. But my training plan said 8 miles, and I'd learned by then that if you skip one long run, it's really easy to skip the next one, and then you're back on the couch eating Oreos and judging people on reality TV. So I went out. I was soaked within ten minutes. My shoes made squelching sounds. My nipples — and I cannot stress this enough — chafed so badly that I discovered blood on my shirt when I got home. BLOOD. FROM MY NIPPLES. Nobody warns you about this.
This is where Body Glide enters the story. Body Glide is basically a stick of anti-chafing balm that looks like deodorant, and it is the single most important product in distance running. You apply it to your nipples, your inner thighs, your armpits, basically anywhere skin touches skin or skin touches fabric for extended periods. If you're running more than 6 miles and you're not using Body Glide, you're going to have a very bad, very raw time. Learn from my bleeding nipples. Buy the Body Glide.
Month 4 is also when I found my running buddy, Mike. Mike was a guy from my office who overheard me talking about my training and said he'd been wanting to start running. He was about where I'd been two months prior. Running with someone else — even someone slower than you, especially someone slower than you — changes everything. You push each other. You talk through the miles (at least the early ones; the later ones are just mutual heavy breathing, which sounds weird but you know what I mean). You hold each other accountable. I'd get a text from Mike at 6 AM saying "We still on?" and even though every fiber of my being wanted to say no, I couldn't let the guy down.
I upgraded my shoes around this time to the Nike Pegasus 41, mostly because my Brooks had about 400 miles on them and the cushioning was getting flat. Running shoe people say you should replace them every 300-500 miles. I thought that was a scam until I put on fresh shoes and felt the difference immediately. It's not a scam.
Month 5: The Taper and the Terror
If you've never heard of tapering, it's this counterintuitive thing where you actually run less in the weeks before a race. You'd think you'd want to cram in as much training as possible, but no — you scale back so your body can recover and be fresh for race day. My peak long run was 12 miles, three weeks before the half marathon. Then I dropped to 10, then 8, then barely anything the week before.
The taper is psychologically brutal. You have all this nervous energy and you're supposed to just... sit with it. I was anxious, irritable, and convinced I was losing fitness by the hour. I Googled "am I losing fitness during taper" approximately 47 times. Every running forum said the same thing: trust the training, you'll be fine, the taper is working even when it doesn't feel like it. I did not believe them. I was certain I'd show up on race day having somehow forgotten how to run.
Let's talk about carb loading, because I did it wrong. The popular image of carb loading is eating a mountain of pasta the night before a race. In reality, carb loading is a multi-day process of slightly increasing your carbohydrate intake while decreasing exercise. What it is NOT is eating three plates of fettuccine alfredo at Olive Garden and calling it "preparation." I did that. My stomach was a disaster area for two days. Genuine strategic error. A normal-sized pasta dinner with some bread is fine. You don't need to eat like you're preparing for hibernation.
The night before the race, I laid out my clothes like a kid before the first day of school. Shorts, shirt, socks (no cotton — moisture-wicking only, another lesson I learned the hard way through blisters), shoes, Body Glide, race bib, energy gels. I set three alarms. I did not sleep well. Every time I dozed off, I'd jerk awake convinced I'd overslept. Classic pre-race insomnia. Totally normal, apparently, and totally miserable.
Race Day: 13.1 Miles of Feelings
5:00 AM. First alarm. I'm awake before it goes off because I've been essentially vibrating with anxiety since 3:30. I eat a banana, a piece of toast with peanut butter, and drink coffee — my standard pre-run meal that had been tested and approved by my gastrointestinal system over many training runs. I drive to the race start. It's still dark. There are hundreds of people there, all wearing running clothes, all looking both excited and vaguely terrified. My people.
Miles 1-3: The start is chaos. Hundreds of people all trying to run at once, jostling for position. My plan was to start slow — a 10:30 pace — but the adrenaline had me at 9:45 within the first mile. I forced myself to slow down. This is maybe the most important thing in a half marathon: do not start too fast. Your legs feel fresh, the crowd is hyped, and your brain says "let's go!" Your brain is wrong. If you go out too fast, miles 10-13 will make you pay for it with interest.
Miles 4-6: I found my rhythm. This is the honeymoon phase. Your body's warmed up, you're not tired yet, and you're clipping along feeling like a legitimate athlete. I was running through a tree-lined road, the sun was coming up, there were people on the side cheering, and I had this moment of genuine, overwhelming gratitude that I'd stuck with this. Six months ago I couldn't climb stairs. Now I was running a half marathon. I may have teared up a little. The sweat disguised it. That's my story.
Miles 7-9: The middle miles are no man's land. You're too far in to quit but too far out to see the end. This is where training kicks in — not physical training, mental training. I broke it into segments. "Just get to the next water station." Then, "Just get to that intersection." Small goals. Manageable chunks. One mile at a time. My pace was holding at 10:15. I was on track.
Mile 10: The Wall. People talk about "hitting the wall" in marathons, but it happens in halfs too, especially for first-timers. Mile 10 was where my legs started feeling like they were filled with wet sand. Every step was heavier than the last. My brain launched its most aggressive "stop" campaign yet: "You've already run 10 miles, that's incredible, you could walk the rest, nobody would judge you, there's no shame in walking." I took an energy gel — those little packets of sugar and electrolytes that taste like cake frosting mixed with regret — and kept running. Not fast. Not pretty. But running.
Miles 11-12: Pure stubbornness. I was running on nothing but willpower and the knowledge that I'd rather collapse than walk. My form had deteriorated. I was shuffling more than running. A woman in her sixties passed me and gave me a thumbs up, which was both encouraging and deeply humbling.
Mile 13-Finish: When I saw the 13-mile marker, something happened. Some reserve tank I didn't know I had opened up. I picked up my pace. I was running faster than I had since mile 2. It made no physiological sense, but the finish line was there, I could see it, and I was not going to cross it looking like I was dying. I was going to cross it looking like I meant to be there.
I crossed in 2 hours, 14 minutes, and 37 seconds.
I will remember that number for the rest of my life.
I stopped, bent over, hands on knees, and just breathed. Then I stood up, collected my finisher's medal — a cheap piece of metal on a ribbon that I now display on my bedroom wall like it's an Olympic gold — and called my mom. She cried. Then I cried. Two grown adults on the phone crying about 13.1 miles. Running is weird.
What Changed (Beyond the Running)
Here's what I didn't expect: the running was almost the least important part.
My body changed. Obviously. I dropped 27 pounds over six months. My resting heart rate went from 78 to 58. I can see actual muscle definition in my legs, which has never happened in my life. Stairs are a joke now. I take them two at a time like a show-off.
My sleep transformed. I used to toss and turn for an hour before falling asleep. Now I'm out within ten minutes. Deep, restorative, dream-filled sleep. Turns out when you actually tire your body out during the day, it wants to recover at night. Revolutionary concept.
My confidence shifted. Not in an arrogant way. In a quiet, foundational way. When you've done something that seemed impossible six months ago, everything else feels a little more achievable. Job interview? I've run 13.1 miles. Hard conversation? I've run 13.1 miles. Anything that requires doing something uncomfortable? Brother, I voluntarily ran in freezing rain with bleeding nipples. I can handle discomfort.
My dating life improved. Not because women are swooning over my 10:15 pace (they are not). But because I carry myself differently. I have a thing I'm passionate about. I have discipline. I have stories that aren't about Netflix shows. Turns out "I just ran a half marathon" is a significantly better conversation starter than "I just finished a really long series on Hulu." Who knew.
My relationship with difficulty changed. This is the big one. I used to avoid hard things. Default to comfort. Take the path of least resistance every single time. Running rewired that. Not completely — I'm still lazy in plenty of areas, let's not get crazy. But I have a fundamentally different relationship with the concept of hard. Hard isn't something to avoid anymore. Hard is where the good stuff happens.
If You're on the Couch Right Now
Look, I'm not going to give you some Tony Robbins speech. You know if you need to hear this or not. But if you're sitting where I was six months ago — out of shape, low energy, avoiding mirrors, making excuses — here's what I'd tell you over a beer:
Start ridiculously small. Walk for 20 minutes. That's it. Do that for a week. Then jog for 30 seconds and walk for 2 minutes. The Couch to 5K app is free and it works. Don't worry about pace, distance, or looking like a runner. You'll look like a runner when you're running. That's literally all it takes.
Buy real running shoes. Go to a running store. Get fitted. Spend the money. This is the one piece of equipment that matters and it's the difference between enjoying running and hating every step.
Tell someone. Not social media. A friend. A family member. Someone who'll check in on you. Accountability is the difference between a lifestyle change and a two-week phase.
Expect to hate it at first. The first two weeks are awful. The first month is hard. Somewhere around week 5 or 6, something shifts. It goes from torture to tolerable to — and I still can't believe I'm saying this — enjoyable. You just have to survive long enough to get there.
Run slow. Slower than you think. Slower than that. If you can't hold a conversation while running, you're going too fast. Most of your runs should be at an easy, conversational pace. I know it feels pointless, like you should be pushing hard every time. You shouldn't. Easy running builds your aerobic base, and your aerobic base is the foundation for everything else.
Don't compare yourself to anyone. Not to Instagram runners, not to the fast people at your local 5K, not to your buddy who ran track in college. Compare yourself to who you were last week. That's the only comparison that matters.
Sign up for a race before you're ready. Having a date on the calendar with money attached to it is remarkably effective motivation. You don't have to sign up for a half marathon. Sign up for a 5K. Give yourself 8-10 weeks. You'll be amazed at what you can do.
I still run four days a week. I'm signed up for another half marathon in the spring, and there's a small, possibly delusional voice in my head whispering about a full marathon by next fall. Six months ago, that sentence would have been comedy. Now it feels like a plan.
My couch still looks inviting every single morning. The Oreos are still in the cabinet. The difference is, now I lace up my shoes and go anyway. Not because I want to. Because I know what's on the other side of the wanting to quit.
And it's worth it. Every painful, sweaty, chafed, exhausted mile of it.
If you want to supplement your running with strength training without a gym membership, here's how to build a killer home gym for under $500. And if you're looking for one more uncomfortable habit that pairs absurdly well with running, I have some thoughts on cold showers that I never thought I'd write.
Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go ice my knees. Some things never change.


